Everytime I had conversations about my childhood memories with my friends, I always feel sad and depressed. I don't know but... I always failed to recall the memories I had from back then. It seems to me that I had lost my memories, and I really can't remember much about them.
Yeah, I do hate my childhood times, but not all of them. There still were happy times I had with my families, relatives, and my primary school friends. Ohh, Primary school ! It was 6 years long but uhh, what I can remember most were only the memories when I was pinched on my stomach by my Kadazandusun language teacher for being so naughty, and the times when we were asked to copy 40 multiple choice questions in 1 and a half hour. I really can't remember much. How sad is that.
It freaks me out when I realized that I had this lost-memories problem. Am I in high risk of getting Alzheimier's disease ? Grr. Please, I don't want that. I know it's in God's hand whether I'd be in that state or not, but, HOPEFULLY, things like that will not happen. Hopefully this is just the side effect of memories overlapping in my mind.. I mean, some memories created, and the old memories were overlapped by it... In order to remember it, we need to search deeeeeeep into the overlapping memories. is there something like that happening in our brain ? hehe.
Do you know how hurtful it is to not be able to remember things ? The emptiness feeling kills you and you feel like you have nothing in the past to hold on to. I'm recalling my memories, maybe I should jot down every memories I remembered. " The Books of Memories " ? Sounds stupid, but maybe it good for me. Blueek.
:: But I know for sure that I hated Hello Kitty since I was a little girl. There's no certain reason about it, I just hate Hello Kitty until now. huhu. I've always been afraid of the dark, but I still sleep with the lights off. ::
